My 3 year old everyone says is really bad. Since I have had my new baby he trys to hit him, pick him up and throw him. What kind of things can i do to stop him from doing that?
Try to stop this now. Imagine him being 5 and 10 yrs old doing this. It can happen, I have seen it! It can be stopped but you have to be more stubborn than he is. If you don’t want to spank, then do time out. And I don’t mean time out where he has to sit in a naughty chair and still gets to watch everyone around him. I mean time out like making him stand with his face in the corner until you tell him he can come out. If he tries to refuse time out and run out of the corner, put him back every time. It doesn’t matter if you have to put him back in the corner 45 times in a row. He will eventually get the picture. But you have to do it EVERY time for EVERY behavior you feel is inappropriate. My nephew was the same way and I put him in time out and he cried and carried on to the point he almost vomited. He told me he was going to throw up while in the corner and I handed him a bowl and told him he wasn’t getting out until his timeout was up. He NEVER misbehaved in my house again! Of course, he is 9 now and STILL hits his mother and little sister with his fist. The bad behavior can be stopped, you just have to show him who is the boss. If he has to go into time out multiple times within a small time frame, it is his own fault, and he will learn. I would also take ALL his toys away from him, and for every day he didn’t have a time out, he could earn one back. I am telling you, he is only 3 but he will continue unless you stop him. You may feel bad and feel guilty, but you have to decide whether you want to feel bad sometimes and have a well behaved child, or not feel bad and have a total monster on your hands.
First of all you must stop comparing your son and your daughter. Not only are they different genders they are different people. Although some girls are easy going and behave well this is not true of all girls. Your son is trying to learn about his world. Sometimes toddlers are so caught up in what is going on around them that your voice doesn’t get through. So they are not really sure why they are being punished. Next time rather than go batty pick him up and go to another room. Sit down and get his attention. Maybe say ":mommy needs to explain something. I asked you to sit down (or whatever you’ve been trying to get him to do). When you don’t listen it makes me very sad because it’s my job to take care of you and make sure you are safe and learn good manners.": At 3 he’s not going to understand everything you say but if you are consistent in explaining why you’re angry or frustrated he will begin to get the picture. Also, he IS a little boy and he needs time and a place to BE a boy. And, the best advice I ever received was ":DON’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF": Now that you have two little darlin’s things will be more hectic and your wits are gonna suffer m’dear. When you get to the very end of them throw ’em out the window and grab that little boy up and hug him, then play with both sweeties for 5 or 10 minutes. Most things can wait that long even if we don’t realize it. Right now is so important to them and in a few years you’ll wish you could just hold their little hands and kiss their pudgy cheeks just one more time. I know this is not the advice you were seeking but I do hope it helps a little. Now, I will pray for you, your babies AND your wits! I wish you many many blessings in the days and the years to come.
I think it is not only important to reprimand the bad behavior but also acknowledge good behavior. Children at this age are usually very eager to please you. I also agree getting him involved in helping care for his new brother is a great idea. Start referring to the baby as his brother, give him some ownership to the new baby. Let him know this baby is his as well as yours. When he does do something good, no matter how small. If you only had to ask one time to do something, make a very big deal. Praise him on what a great listener he is. Go on and on about how he is doing such a great job and thank him for doing what you ask. Stop what you are doing when you are praising him. Don’t be focused on something else, look him in the eye, have a huge smile, and give him a great big hug. Do this often. My son lights up when I do this. He will often point out to me when he has done something I’ve asked right away or remembered to do something like close the bathroom door after using the toilet. He just eats it up. Then when he does act up I usually only have to act disappointed and restate what I want done and he is right back in line. Best luck to you and your family.
First, realize that kind of behavior doesn’t start overnight, so you aren’t going to solve it with a magic potion. Second, think what would super nanny do. You need to explain to your child why he shouldn’t hit his little brother/sister. If he doesn’t listen, stick him in a corner. Also, give him rewards when he behaves. Spanking your child for hitting is a pretty silly response, don’t you think? The main thing to realize is that while he is a little person, you are still the one in charge. Don’t negotiate with him, tell him how it is going to be, and make it so.
I almost forgot, also, a big factor in this behavior could be a lack of attention. Make sure when guests like Grandma come over, they pay attention to him, and not just the baby. But don’t reward him with attention for bad behavior.
keep him away from the baby until this behavior stops completely. i would bust his hind end butt some people don’t believe in that so you just need to explain to him that he is being bad and you will not tolerate that behavior anylonger. you must be firm and stick to what you say, that is the main thing here, like the other lady said either put him in a high chair or just a regular chair in a corner for 3 minutes, no less. and do it everytime no matter how many times it takes to get it through to him that he is not allowed to act that way. good luck hun!! mother of 3
Number one, for the safety for the baby, keep them separated and never leave the baby alone.
Second, whenever your three year old misbehaves give him one warning and be firm about it. Get down eye level with him and look him right in the eye. If he does it again, put him in the high chair and set your microwave for 3 minutes. Be consistant…do this every single time. While it won’t happen overnight, the behavior will stop.
ok, ignore that last answer. That is rude. Your child is acting out… he is not the first child to do that. I would however just lay down the law. Sometimes my child acts out and my attitude is ‘all I can do is my best… but some things I just CANNOT and WILL NOT tolerate in my house’. I would severely punish him for those behaviours. Acting out, sending you a message or not, that is dangerous. I would find something very important to him and take it away. Since it is such a serious issue, I might consider spanking although I don’t condone spanking myself. My daughter did go through a period where she would bite, attack me, hit me and kick me. I was mortified. I just can’t allow that in my house. That was one of the rare times I physically punished her. Time outs didn’t work. Taking toys away didn’t work. Sometimes abstract punishments don’t work. Sometimes the kids just need to see ‘what it feels like to get hit’. Like in daycare.. if they hit someone.. if that kid hits them back… I bet they won’t hit that kid again! That is the approach I used and my daughter quit hitting almost immedietaly. I dont’ like hitting her and I made sure to do it calmly and without ‘reasoning and words’. I just got really calm, stayed in control of my emotions and said very quietly ‘now I will show you how that feels’. I would only hit her as hard as she hit me and in the same spot (the leg, the back, etc). I hated doing it. Hated it but honestly… nothing worked. Every punishment was just too abstract… or wasn’t severe enough to get through to her. I did it.. I am not proud of it.. but it worked! I would do it again. In my house.. you just DON":T hit or kick or bite EVER.
Well i have a 3yr old and a new baby what works for me i got him involed with the baby like have him throw away the diapers getting me a diaper and wipes help with bath time and bottle feeding. He does really good with him. And also very important when i’m not with the baby i spend time with him i take him out like to parks or friends that have children his age. Also if he’s hurting the baby you need to disapline like time out and explain why and what he’s doing that he can’t hurt baby. He’s jealous that’s why he’s acting like that cause his not the baby and baby gots mommy attention and it’s not on your son no more.
teach him that hitting hurts people and introduce him to the naughty door or the badd boy door as i call it. Even if he raises his hand put him in the bad boy door, if he gets out put him back and it will take a day or so but he will learn that if he hits or is bad he will go to the bad boy door and every door in my house is the bad boy door.
New babies require a lot of attention and care right well are you giving the same attention and care to your 3yr old. Both your children should have one on one time with you to avoid jealousy.
DO NOT SPANK IT TEACHES KIDS ITS OKAY TO HIT!!!
Well he’s just jealous, cause the newborn is getting all the attention. Go spend some time with him, if he still continues, give him a good-talking too, if it still persists a tight slap would help.