Really depressed. want to kill myself for being gay?

I hate life!! No matter how many times i try and think of a way to tell my family it ends in a lose situation for me. i can’t tell my mother b/c she would tell my savage of a father then would tell my brother (who i recently found out watches porn. i found out secretly) I hate myself b/c I can’t give the gift of grandchildren to my mother who works so hard! I feel like i’m such a waste. i hate myself for being gay, i hate my brother for being a porno addict, and i hate my dad b/c he was NEVER there for me…i have no bond for him b/c he gets mad at everything and we are exact opposites.

I don’t want to be gay!! My mother doesn’t deserve to be the mother of a disgraceful family…

I can’t tell ANYONE because i’m afraid they would go behind my back and tell my family. Only friends know. I can’t trust family or school adults.

Life sucks and i’m sick of living a lie! It’s the biggest burden i have ever dealt with in my entire life. On top of that being bullied to the point of suicide, and being a complete social outcast. It would only get worse.

I know that I’ll be home homecoming and prom night crying because i couldn’t go with a boyfriend b/c that would ruin everything. i’m not going to see a counselor – that just fuels the fire. it makes me feel like i’m crazy…my mother keeps on saying how happy she will be when i bring home a girl. Which makes me even more depressed because she doesn’t know that…i can’t :'(

I’m ashamed of being gay and it’s ruining my life!!

Advice please 🙁

It’s NOT a disgrace to be gay and you should love yourself. Every single person has the right to be who they are and be happy, regardless of whether anyone around them approves. You are not ruining anyone’s life (including your own) just because you’re gay. I came out when I was in high school at 17. My mother was not surprised, but she wondered if I would always be gay. Well, now I am 39 and I am STILL a lesbian and I have a wife. I’ve never been with guys. My wife and I are planning a family. My mother came to our wedding and sent us an anniversary card this month! Been married for 3 years now (although it’s not legal). I don’t know your age or what your family is really like, so it might be a better idea for you to wait with your coming out yet. Sometimes parents can forbid their kid to be with certain people once the kid comes out. Parents have lots of power and you have to pick your moment and the right age to tell them something like this. Also, be careful about coming out at school. I think it’s GREAT that you want to. But do it wisely and be CAREFUL if you choose to tell a friend and whom it is. A teenager also has to be smart and careful when coming out and finding lovers. But please don’t think about harming yourself over this. I know it’s not the easiest life. But remember that nobody’s life is easy for one reason or another. You can get through this and still be yourself and find happiness. Believe me. If I were there with you, I would certainly protect you from being bullied. Nobody needs that sh*t. You have every right to be gay and to be happy. Don’t ever pretend to be someone or something you aren’t just to please someone else. If someone doesn’t like you as-is, then screw ’em. You should not lower yourself to living a lie. I think you know that. Besides, doing that will make you depressed in a whole new way and you will resent people you’re trying to please and be unhappy with yourself. And even if you think being gay is ruining your life, it will get better for you in time and when school is over. College is better than high school because more mature people tend to be found there. They are reading and learning all about homosexuality and they are growing up. You will meet lots of other gay people whether you attend college or not!! As you get older, you will even discover some gay people that you never knew were gay in high school! It’s important to make some friends who are gay and are gay-friendly. Then you won’t feel so alone and isolated..
Please don’t think of hurting yourself. It may seem like an odd comfort that suicide is an &quot:option.&quot: But don’t consider it an option. One of my friends killed herself with a rope around her neck. She was 30 and depressed over not getting her ex-girlfriend back, and losing a job. I never knew she was so depressed and I didn’t get a chance to talk to her about her feelings. She’ll never know what her life could have become, and she has left so many people behind hurting forever. She robbed herself of having a life. So I am telling you because you seem to need someone to reach out to you.
I wish you the best of luck. Thanks for reading. We’re all human beings here. Please trust my advice even if you don’t know me.

PS – Yes, please come to New York (like someone else suggested on here!) If I saw any gay person being bullied, I’d crack someone’s @$$ the other way.


if its something u cant really deal with i say look for some serious hobbies instead of thinking about ur sex life, head into a career u like

life isnt about sex

Being gay is nature’s best gift. Appreciate it.

you should only care bout the ppl that love you and nothing else matters. if people arent happy that your gay too bad for them its your life what do they care.

i was the same a couple months ago and i learned how to deal with it so i just didnt tell them and i only told my brother….and he didnt yeah just talk to me on msn if you need to talk to someone…..

Oh stop, come to New York, you’ll be loved.

If you hate being gay be straight i guess


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