Alert for all of us senior citizens :)?


We Must Stop This Immediately!

Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper . Groceries are heavier . And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street has become! This extension work was apparently done at night !! Very sneaky stuff.. And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the youngsters. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they’re red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age.

On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day, and she has aged so much that she didn’t even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own reflection ……..Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You’re risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them.. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 32 pair of pants a 42, or medium shirt as ‘extra large? Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the waist, hips, thighs, and neck?

The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually believe the number I see on that dial? Heck ! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they’re fooling? I’d like to call up someone in authority to report what’s going on — but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they’ve printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in there!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.


PS: I am sending this to you in a larger font size, because something has caused my computer’s regular fonts to be smaller than they once were. (They must be sneaking to my house and messing around with my computer. Probably CIA….!!!) Pretty scary stuff huh?

You have pulled out a gem. Yes, I have already mailed it to friends just to show how creative this group can still be. I wish I could give several stars for this.

Yes dear, I have noticed all of these things.

But I wondered, have you noticed what they’ve done to the sidewalks? You can’t walk down the street without tripping on the uneven pavement. They must have put those lifters in at night so I couldn’t observe what they were doing.

Oh well, just add this to the list!

All senior citizens need life alert!!!


You have hit this one dead on.

I enjoyed it so much that I have added it to my own personal archive for background evidence of the great conspiracy going on around us!! Keep up the good work. And for your next report, could you add some footnotes to show us the research done and articles perused, so that we have a perfect evidenciary trail?

OMG I loved this…. awwwww aging huh… sucks at the best of times but everyone gets there one day .. Lets hope they don’t have the conspiracy theory going too. Can you imagine all the young teens today having this done to them some day!! Oh My Lord… Then again it could be us in our second childhood playing these games on THEM .. hahahaha too funny… thanks for the chuckle!!!

Appreciate the heads-up, but it came a bit late. In my area of the country, it started happening two years ago. I’ve been in a state of Cleopatra since (in de-Nile).

Your description made my day, my week, my month. Encore!

I so love this one, are you in the states? I think they’ve infiltrated the uk now as well.

This is all so true! lol x

Totally agree! Nobody holds doors open for you any more unless their past 70!

Thank you for making me laugh so many times! WOW!

I loved it!!!! It’s really funny. It was great!. Thank you very much for cheering me up!!!

Very creative and .. oh my .. how true!!!! hehehe

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